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Online now: 1 member: TABLE SETTER 11; 59 anonymousDiscussion: Critical read on utilizing engineering & physics while selecting your new senior bat
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| Jan. 23, 2018 Tri18 352 posts | Critical read on utilizing engineering & physics while selecting your new senior bat Hello Everyone, I thought I would share a few insights with you concerning the critical components of engineering and physics involved in selecting your new senior bat for 2018. Let me preface this by saying that I enjoy reading and talking with people who are much smarter than I am and sometimes even at my advanced age and diminished learning capacity, I learn something. When you consider all the data, abbreviations, tolerances, and measurements being thrown around, the average player can become downright confused. So...after years of studying thousands of guinea pig players and myself, we created the softball super computer so we can find out exactly which bat is best for you. Remember, this is a serious investment of a very large sum of money and we don't want to get this wrong or this could severely restrict the bar tab that we run up that totally exceeds whatever we are spending on the subject bat just about every weekend we play. I mean if you ponder this decision, it could take more time and effort than deciding what house we can afford to buy. So, everyone knows that a computer can only spit out correct data if the program inside of it has the content within it to do so. We created the Softball super Program with literally thousands of critical input areas so we can be absolutely sure that at the end...it spits out the right bat for you! Remember, your bar tab is riding on this. We took into account the content of how MOI, BPF, BBS, SW, BP, BBF, BS, LOL, SSUSA, HOF, COR, IMO, EL, MAXLD and a bunch of others and fed it into our computer. Then we put in all of the parts and pieces of the bat itself like carbon, Kevlar, nylon, rubber, metals, epoxy, plastic, leather, glue, and a bunch of other INERT ingredients and fed that into the computer. And then we brought in the most COMPLEX PIECE OF THE PUZZLE...YOU and your BRAIN. We had our team of doctors measure you from head to toe...I mean wouldn't added arm length increase leverage and have a direct effect if the MOI we were putting out made a difference with various BPF factors while hitting various COR softballs and the humidity was at 74%? What happened when we took off 1/1000th of a gram in the rod in the handle of the bat and transferred it by putting 1/16th of a bb shot in the end of the bat? And I just forgot that in the lab we forgot to set the temperature and humidistat in the lab to equal the exact averages of where you play the most in the region that you live....We need to abandon this test and start over as our data is totally inaccurate and will not show us exactly what bat we should buy. Remember, our quality of life is at stake here as it directly compares to the size of our bar tab.... So lets start the test over and get the right data into the softball super computer. Well....who the heck built this computer and is it really 100% accurate? This particular computer happens to be my pea sized brain that is shrinking quickly with age and overuse. In fact, the power supply is going bad and it has voltage and wattage bursts and surges which directly effect its effectiveness but lets keep going anyway.... Back at the lab we have the temperature and humidity data programmed in properly. We have 16,237 electrodes taped all over ever critical area of your body and some forcibly placed in strategic 7th inning areas as well. We NEED to have this data be 100% accurate right !? Our batting gloves are on and we are ready to swing at the first pitch....Sweat is already pouring down and...wait a minute! Sweat is pouring down? Wont that affect our COG (center of gravity) and reduce bat speed? How can this test be accurate? How am I ever going to be able to pick out the right bat for me? STOP THE TEST, all the scientists on hand agree we have to remove the sweat as it is ruining our data and have decided we are best to head to the bar, drink something cold to stop the sweating, and most importantly have the studied subject player pick up the bar tab. O no...if I pick up this bar tab, I cant buy a bat. Well, forget the bat for now lets take care of the situation at hand at the bar and we will figure out the bat purchase later. I mean do we really NEED to buy new front tires on the truck? Aren't they made out of Kevlar too and my bat engineer says that stuff makes it the most durable ever? so....meanwhile another day goes by and we call the Super lab to reschedule an appointment. In the meantime we missed 13 league games and 4 tournaments because we cant decide what bat to buy and the stupid guys at the lab don't know how to make that lame brained computer work. Aren't I smarter than that dumb computer anyway? Most likely, yes but I HAVE to find the right bat or I can't be my best. My very existence, (Bar tab, mortgage, and house itself) depend on it. So with great anticipation, I show up at the lab after 3,457 hours of deliberation, testing, and bar time. The lab is set and has been adjusted thermostatically to take in account of my body temperature at the time of impact. I pull on my brand new set of Team 1 Sports batting gloves and wait for the first pitch. Just as I am about to put every abbreviation I have ever learned into MOC (MOMENT OF CONTACT... *for you lame brained ignorant fools) the lead engineer screams out : WAIT DONT SWING!!! I try to stop my swing but its too late...my IDS (inertia during swing...see *) coupled with the 1/2 ounce end load caused the muscles in my forearm to tear and now I'm out for the season. I guess I don't need a new bat after all. So...in true softball fashion, we head over to the bar to discuss the test data. After 4 and 3/16th rounds of drinks ingested at 39.4 degrees I asked the engineer: Why did you yell at me to stop my swing/ He answered: At tests 1 and 2 you had on a different pair of batting gloves and at test 3 you had on Team 1 Sports batting gloves which would have polluted the data and the test results. EVERYBODY WHO IS ANYBODY KNOWS the TEAM ! Sports batting gloves are the most slippery and aerodynamic batting gloves ever developed. I hired Lance Armstrongs engineering and design crew from Project One and Livestrong to develop these in the wind tunnel. We spent over 29 Million dollars in research and development to build a pair of $25 batting gloves. I even created my own abbreviation in the development of these which is critical to all softball players...FGR Frictional Grip Response. The FGR on the Team 1 Sports gloves is so good that it changes the dynamics of a player holding his or her bat and has a direct effect on which bat they should swing. The other critical ramifications of FGR is the ability to grab your zipper in the 6th inning and get it up and down like lightning so you can use the bathroom quickly before its your turn to hit after you have ingest 58.6 ounces of Red Bull, Gatorade, Water, and Bud Lite before and during the game. (Of course, no Bud Lite was ingested during the game)Thank GOODNESS the engineer caught that or my test would have been totally inaccurate and I would have bought the wrong bat depending of course if my wife let me. So the night at the bar carries on and the rounds continue. finally the lead engineer leans over and whispers the best owrds a player can ever hear: Even with limited testing time our computer is so advanced and intelligent that is was able to print out what you want: The perfect bat for you to buy! Ahhhh! Music to my ears, can I see the print out? He nods nd hands me over a rumpled paper something that feels quite comforting like I've known it before. I look down and read "YOUR PERFECT BAT MADE FOR YOU" : You need a Dudley end cap on a Miken Freak barrel, with an Adidas handle, and a knob from the Combat Ambush. The end load should come from a Demarini not to exceed .21 ounces impregnated in epoxy from the Easton Elder. Below that it said INFORMATION VOID IF OVER 78 DEGREES AND 64% HUMIDITY. Those of you who know me know I love to kid around and I love the game of softball, the equipment, and most of all the players I meet on the journey. The biggest asset you have when selecting the bat is YOU and YOUR BRAIN. Yes, get WISE council from people who are educated on the subject but DON'T OVERTHINK THINGS. You aren't buying a house , its a softball bat. You have fantastic choices from a variety of companies to choose from these days. Yes, that can seem confusing at times but again, seek wise council and then go out and hit some of the bats out in the marketplace if you cant decide. Choose the one that FEELS BEST TO YOU when you are swinging it, Make sure you swing it CONSISTENTLY WELL not just for 10 swings. If you want to ask me any questions feel free to reach out and I can do a short interview and possibly help you narrow down your decision. Most importantly... have fun in 2018 and enjoy your new bat !! AT18 Team 1 Sports tricoach18@att.net |
| Jan. 23, 2018 raiderman66 77 posts | This is pure sarcasm at it's finest. Well said and the beauty of it,is that the people that this was intended for will probably still be oblivious to it's points... |
| Jan. 23, 2018 stever Men's 70 99 posts | You forgot to factor in age and physical conditioning! Not to mention whether you are right or left handed. Need to start over. |
| Jan. 23, 2018 DaveDowell Men's 70 4315 posts | Alan ... What a monumental post! ... It actually approaches the historical einstein-ian era Message Board record for meaningless bandwidth consumption in a single post! ... Well done (and you have way too much time on your hands!) ... [grins] |
| Jan. 23, 2018 fennellwg Men's 60 97 posts | Excellent. Your grasp of the relevant facts is humbling. regards, bill |
| Jan. 23, 2018 Uncle Mike Men's 60 122 posts | Great post ! You are exactly right. I need to hold and swing a bat before I commit to buying it. I’ve known for a long time that I prefer a heavy end-loaded bat. Remember the old Easton Redline with the Mother Lode. I don’t know why- it may be from following my dad around the softball fields back in the 1960’s, and swinging his bat all of the time. Most of the senior bats on the market perform well- I loved the Melee, Hyper Z, Dudley Lightning, the original Miken, the old black Combat, etc... the problem I have - is durability. All of those bats broke on me in less than 1 year. This is my 11th year playing Senior Softball and I have gone through 13 senior bats. I finally found a bat that made it through that 1st year- the Miken Freak Jason Kendrick model. When this one breaks, I plan on buying another Miken Freak- but I’ll be going up to the heavier end-load. I almost bought the Rocket Launcher a few years ago, but it just didn’t feel right when I swung it. But there was some hype about how hot that bat was “in and out of the wrapper”. And I did see a guy hitting rockets with it in Utah- but I never saw many more on the field. With that said, a special thanks to you and David Velasquez for posting your bat reviews !! I know that I really appreciate it !!! |
| Jan. 23, 2018 Tri18 352 posts | Appreciate the words everyone. Please don’t think I’m not talking at myself too! You have to learn to,laugh at yourself in this world sometimes. Knowledge can be powerful but crippling. I have to watch myself in that regards and not think too much. Anyway, I’m always up for a good laugh and me and our little Softball sub culture are prime candidates for that sometimes. Seriously though, anytime you have questions get with me. A little knowledge applied in the right direction can narrow our decisions down sometimes. Occasionally, my pea sized brain can contribute. See you all at the TOC,! AT18 Team 1Sports 561-718-7504 Ps; In the back of the book after you read it all..... if you read carefully.... the computer printout paper felt familiar. At a later meeting when I had recouped enough money to provide a bar tab I asked the lead engineer why the paper felt so familiar and what type that they had spec’Ed for their powerful computer. “Charmin Ultra he replied....the information contained on it is worth about as much as the paper....” 2018 the best year ever ! |
| Jan. 24, 2018 fennellwg Men's 60 97 posts | YOU SAY YOU WERE MAKING FUN OF ME!!..?....NO WAY!! That’s not me...well maybe. OK, that is me, I can’t deny it. I’m like every other geezer on this site, nobody ever changes. I don’t really expect to see myself change anytime soon, but I would like to stop swinging at low, inside pitches. Besides, it is funny Alan has always proven himself to be one of the best, on many levels. Now you can add psychological counseling. Do you make house calls? -bill |
